We had to take a physical fitness test in school today. It sucked! I had to run laps until I felt like my liver was going to explode, and then I couldn't do any pull-ups and Coach Mack called me a street rat. I'll bet he's just mad that he didn't make the rollerball team when he was in school, the jerk.

That big bully Chip Reynolds took my lunch money and tore up my copy of Sergeant Newton Hardy and the Dinosaur Brigade today. I hate him so much! Mr. Harrington says if you ignore a bully, he'll lose interest. My dad says that's a crock of bullcrap (except he didn't say bullcrap, he said a bad word) and that the only way to deal with a bully is to smash his elbow in. He's really big though! Maybe I should take some las-fu lessons.