| Life was hard as an orphan on the streets of Morpork, without a grandpa or girlfriend to teach you right from wrong. On the other hand, you wouldn't have grown up to be such a talented Thief otherwise. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Mondale. There, you met an inkeeper's quarter-witted aunt, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Emerald Marmot. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. You were rocking the house until you dropped your handaxe in a cheese-grater and couldn't get it back out. Wouldn't you know it, that was when the lizardmen showed up. However, you knew you'd never be a mighty adventurer if you let a little setback like that stop you, and damned if you were going to end up a stableboy in some crummy backwater like Pittsburgh or Piehole. So you pressed onward until you discovered the lair of the Devil Wizard Frazool, and after a long and dramatic battle you successfully put an end to his evil ways. And then you looted the hell out of his hideout.
|