| Lacking the patience to be a Mage and the brawn to be a Fighter, you decided to be the next best thing: a professional chef. Sadly, your recipe for steamed shortbread was unappreciated by the plebes in your tiny hometown of Mondale, so you became a professional Thief instead. In the fiefdom of Marmosettia, in the unpleasant-smelling backwater of Dogspittle, you found an inn with cheap lager and spent the night carousing. There, you heard a tale of the forgotten treasure of the Sapphire Caves, lost for ages during the time of the great reaping. You decided to seek the treasure yourself, heedless of the literal mountain of skeletons of those who had tried before you. You were doing a neat job but then you wandered into a room totally full of bandits, plus a roper, which is weird because you would have figured they'd have killed each other. They made a pretty good attempt at killing you, though. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's pyramid, dispatching hobos left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Death Wizard Diabolico. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your crossbow into his ear. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil git was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Pinochle.
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