| Lacking the patience to be a Mage and the brawn to be a Fighter, you decided to be the next best thing: a professional chef. Sadly, your recipe for deep-fried mutton vindaloo was unappreciated by the plebes in your tiny hometown of Ironforge, so you became a professional Thief instead. As luck would have it, you found yourself wandering through the sleepy village of Mondale just as the village people (you know, the construction worker, the cop, the Indian) were beset by the evil Wizard Grognard, who had poisoned the town's sugar glider population. Against your better judgment (and with the hope of fat loot to come), you agreed to try and bring the villain to justice. Everything was going great until you got lost in a dungeon -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet battleaxe +1 in a bugbear's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some kobolds into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the foot. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your club and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Vampire Sorcerer Spitefibula's army of thin gypsies. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil douchebag into his own meat grinder, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Farnsworthington.
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