| An ancient prophecy foretold of a child born in the city of Morcestecershire with a barbell-shaped birthmark, who would grow up to be the greatest Wizard ever known. You have a birthmark like that, but at first you were only a sort of okay Wizard. Everyone has to start somewhere, I guess. One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Cheddarwurst when you met the town "seamstress". That worthy begged you to try and rescue a knight's tattooed homie, who had been kidnapped by thieves. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. It wasn't a thing until you had to fend off half a dozen accountants with your skull trapped in a beartrap. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the owlbear showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. Fortunately, "giving up" isn't in your dictionary (probably because it's two words), so you persevered. You fought your way through countless jerks and dark elves -- even a mimic! But eventually you found the lair of the sinister Horror Troll Goldthwait, and were able to defeat him by knocking him into a sphere of annihilation with a lucky critical hit. Bruised but successful, you made it back to the nearby city of Nickelodeon and claimed your reward.
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