| Life was hard as an orphan on the streets of Spazmotic, without a dad or sister to teach you right from wrong. On the other hand, you wouldn't have grown up to be such a talented Thief otherwise. At the tiny tavern on the outskirts of the Village of Foobar, you were trapped in a conversation with a man who had clearly had more than his fill of mead. He told you about the great plague of eels that had beset the entire region of Marmosettia, and of the rumor that the evil Lord Unpleasantor was the source of the unpleasantness. You resolved to find the villain and dispatch him, mostly to get the drunk guy to shut up. Everything was hunky-dory at first, but you didn't expect to have to bareknuckle-fight all those indigent native tribesmen. That rust monster picked the total worst time to eat your entrenching tool. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's sewer, dispatching ents left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Devil Lawyer Diabolico. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your teddy bear into his ankle. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil dweeb was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Glameroth.
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