| You always knew that the village of Whacking wasn't big enough for you -- after all, it was just the one hut, and it was a small one. So, when you came of age, you decided to make a name for yourself as a Fighter. (You parents never gave you a name. You were hoping for "Davey".) You rode into the city of Bale, and met a shadowy stranger in a hooded cloak who was sitting in the corner of the local bar. He told you about the legendary Azure Bat of Shaffly-on-Surrey, which is rumored to be hidden in an ancient strip mall near the village of Dogspittle, and promised you a hefty fee if you could bring it to him. Figuring he wouldn't offer you the quest if it weren't level-appropriate, you readily agreed. You were rocking the house until you had to fend off half a dozen ents with your nipple trapped in a spiked pit. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the horse showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Terror Warrior Evilthing held court over his horde of simple hobos, and with uncountable swings of your spoon (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible assjacket and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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