| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Gallston, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a underdeveloped, sexy cook. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). As luck would have it, you found yourself wandering through the sleepy village of Mondale just as the village people (you know, the construction worker, the cop, the Indian) were beset by the evil Warrior Hasslehoff, who had poisoned the town's parakeet population. Against your better judgment (and with the hope of fat loot to come), you agreed to try and bring the villain to justice. You were rocking the house until you got your bung caught in a swinging razor-sharp pendulum and had to gnaw it off to escape. Fortunately, you don't need that to be a hero... but you will sort of miss it. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Ice Knight Mawmosquito held court over his horde of raven-haired ents, and with uncountable swings of your flail (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible hoser and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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