| An ancient prophecy foretold of a child born in the city of Waltermatthau with a pair of sunglasses-shaped birthmark, who would grow up to be the greatest Wizard ever known. You have a birthmark like that, but at first you were only a sort of okay Wizard. Everyone has to start somewhere, I guess. At the tiny tavern on the outskirts of the Village of Phlegm, you were trapped in a conversation with a man who had clearly had more than his fill of barley pop. He told you about the great plague of chipmunks that had beset the entire region of Farnsworthington, and of the rumor that the evil King Grognard was the source of the unpleasantness. You resolved to find the villain and dispatch him, mostly to get the drunk guy to shut up. Everything was hunky-dory until you dropped your nunchuks in a gelatinous cube and couldn't get it back out. Wouldn't you know it, that was when the orphans showed up. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's dungeon, dispatching tramps left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Grim Knight Shredancient. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your nunchuks into his kidney. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil smartass was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Eggshire.
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