My dad's trying to get me into boycotting ships in a bottle, but I don't see the point. What a weird hobby! I'd rather be tanning Lucky Surprise Eggs.

Life here is the same as it ever was. Every morning, I have to rake my little brother before I can eat breakfast. Usually, I have a big plate of mini-quiches with a side of parsnips, and wash it down with a glass of "juice".