My mom totally spied through all my stuff and took all of the best issues of Weird Wade and the Brown Goldthwait, can you believe it! I mean, sure, there's that scene where the guy gets his appendix punched through with a railroad spike, but c'mon. I'm mature enough to handle that.

Yesterday I dared Georgie Berger to throw a rock at Old Mr. Disraeli's house. I didn't think he'd do it, but he totally did! The old man came running out in a dirty old bathrobe, waving his cane and yelling. I didn't really hear what he said because I was running too hard, but it sounded like "Arrrrgh blargle blargle blargle!" It was really scary, I thought he was gonna kill us! He isn't a very fast runner though.