Mom kept pestering me to wash the windows while I was playing Modern Fantasy 2 today. I tried to tell her I was in the middle of a boss fight, but she made me do it anyway. She said "You can lead a horse to water, the shoe was lost." I have no idea what she's talking about when she says stuff like that. Sometimes I wonder if I'm adopted.

The other day me and Larry were playing rugby over by the old haunted quarry and he said he thought he saw a zombie. I told him they weren't real, and he got this weird look in his eyes and said "Oh, they're real. They're real, all right. You'll find out soon enough."