| At an early age, you were apprenticed to the Great Wizard Conway, but you grew tired of having to rake the floors and clean the alchemical equipment day in and day out. So, you stole a spellbook and took off to become a Wizard on your own. One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Dumpington when you met the town squire. That worthy begged you to try and rescue the Dauphin's buxom second cousin, who had been kidnapped by hobos. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. You were doing really well up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a iron maiden and a antlion pit, with a lich bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your giblets. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's ruin, dispatching hobos left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Devil Barbarian Frazool. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your morningstar into his kidney. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil buffoon was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Flansburgh.
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