| Lacking the patience to be a Mage and the brawn to be a Fighter, you decided to be the next best thing: a professional chef. Sadly, your recipe for steamed creamed french fries was unappreciated by the plebes in your tiny hometown of Morpork, so you became a professional Thief instead. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Mondale. There, you met the Sultan's homely cousin, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Gold Raccoon. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. You were doing really well but you soon were confounded by a fiendish rune-deciphering puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were livid as an underfed puppy. However, you knew you'd never be a mighty adventurer if you let a little setback like that stop you, and damned if you were going to end up a midwife in some crummy backwater like Piehole or Frog. So you pressed onward until you discovered the lair of the Horror Sorcerer Krampus, and after a long and dramatic battle you successfully put an end to his evil ways. And then you looted the hell out of his hideout.
|