| You grew up the son of a tavernkeep, but decided such a profession was lacking in excitement. After much hard training, (if you never ride my bike again, it'll be too soon) you finally became a mighty Fighter. Having heard many rumors about how Calamaria was being systematically sacked by a band of marauding desperados (who had already looted and burned the villages of Cheddarwurst, Deaf Chicken, and Pittsburgh), and the ludicrous reward being offered for the kidney of their leader, you decided it was finally time to put your mettle to the test. At first it was a real breeze, up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a vending machine and a cookie jar, with a carrion crawler bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your elbow. However, you managed to overcome the odds (and your injuries), and after a lengthy crawl through a sewer infested with tramps, you finally came upon the lair of the Fire Wizard Ribmaster, who was guarding the object of your quest. The evil fiend fell before your morningstar, and the land was finally free of his foul shenanigans. You made your way back to civilization, and basked in the glory of your success (and the reward money).
|