| Ever since you were a child in the meager village of Cheddarwurst, you wanted to become a great Wizard and learn the great mysteries of the universe, such as whether the chicken or the deep-fryer came first. The answer turned out to not be very interesting, but by that time you were a Wizard anyway. One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Hamlet when you met the town chambermaid. That worthy begged you to try and rescue the Sultan's raven-haired nephew, who had been kidnapped by badgers. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. You were doing a wicked job until you got attacked by more barbarians than you could handle. You were lucky to get out of there with your knee intact! But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Skull Lawyer Frazool held court over his horde of sexy ents, and with uncountable swings of your brass knuckles (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible butthole and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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