| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Coney Island, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a nubile, tattooed milkmaid. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). As you wandered the back alleys of Cabbagetown (and let's face it, most of that place is back alleys), a hand covered your mouth while a blade pushed gently at your ribs. You let yourself be dragged into a pitch-dark abandoned tallow rending plant. A sultry female voice introduced herself as Cornflower Fear mist. She asked you to undertake a quest to recover the barman's lost gerbil, Maru. Reasoning it was the best quest you'd get until you leveled up a bit, you agreed to help. At first it was a real breeze, until you got lost in a tower -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet spear +1 in a mind flayer's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some gangsters into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the giblets. But all that drama couldn't stop you. You'd never given up on anything, not even your childhood quest to mop all the guinea pig in your hometown of Piehole. So you kept going, right into the ironmongery of the evil Knight Maulboar. Fortunately for you, he was out for lunch at the time, so you could grab some loot and get out before you got your giblets handed to you.
|