| Life was hard as an orphan on the streets of Hamlet, without a grandpa or aunt to teach you right from wrong. On the other hand, you wouldn't have grown up to be such a talented Thief otherwise. As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Morcestecershire, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Morpork, and heard the local blacksmith talking about the ancient dungeon that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Sapphire Idol of Krampus that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. At first it was a real breeze, at first, but you didn't expect to have to bareknuckle-fight all those dire dwarves. That horse picked the total worst time to eat your knife. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your dagger and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Grim Marquis Shriekradius's army of sexy gunslingers. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil jerk into his own crocodile's mouth, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Reeves.
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