| As a child, you exhibited a normal of unusual talents, including the ability to Split the Atom the first day you picked up a yo-yo. So your parents, creeped out by your paranormal abilities, enrolled you in Stoatsford Wizard School. Before long, you earned your Gamma of Silver and could set out to make your fortune. In the fiefdom of Stoatsford, in the unpleasant-smelling backwater of Foobar, you found an inn with cheap root beer and spent the night carousing. There, you heard a tale of the forgotten treasure of the Azure Forests, lost for ages during the time of the great earth-rending. You decided to seek the treasure yourself, heedless of the literal mountain of skeletons of those who had tried before you. You weren't having any problems until you had to fend off half a dozen goblins with your foot trapped in a cheese-grater. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the owlbear showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your mace and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Evil Marquis Diablolo's army of comely bullywugs. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil yokel into his own spiked pit, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Wibbleshire.
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