After your quiet hometown of Bobcat was attacked by bullywugs and, despite your young age, you were forced to take up arms to defend it, you decided that the life of a Fighter was the life you were looking for. It would be a long and difficult road, but it sure beat the heck out of being a seamstress like your brother wanted.

As you wandered the back alleys of Whacking (and let's face it, most of that place is back alleys), a hand covered your mouth while a blade pushed gently at your ribs. You let yourself be dragged into a pitch-dark abandoned brewery. A sultry female voice introduced herself as Forest Blood crest. She asked you to undertake a quest to recover the Earl of Bacon's lost mongoose, Cuddles. Reasoning it was the best quest you'd get until you leveled up a bit, you agreed to help.

You were doing really well up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a spiked pit and a cheese-grater, with a roper bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your arse.

However, you managed to overcome the odds (and your injuries), and after a lengthy crawl through a strip mall infested with hobgoblins, you finally came upon the lair of the Vampire Devil Lord Unpleasantor, who was guarding the object of your quest. The evil fiend fell before your teddy bear, and the land was finally free of his foul shenanigans. You made your way back to civilization, and basked in the glory of your success (and the reward money).

Loot:pike of infravision
+23 elbowpads of mediocrity
Greyhawk Army knife of spiteful dancing

Another!