| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Ov'reezy, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a fat, quarter-witted tavernkeep. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Klatch when you met the town village idiot. That worthy begged you to try and rescue a charwoman's fat uncle, who had been kidnapped by gnolls. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. Everything was hunky-dory up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a antlion pit and a spiked pit, with a mind flayer bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your shoulder. However, you knew you'd never be a mighty adventurer if you let a little setback like that stop you, and damned if you were going to end up a village idiot in some crummy backwater like Whacking or Stubborn Mule. So you pressed onward until you discovered the lair of the Evil Lawyer Blackfist, and after a long and dramatic battle you successfully put an end to his evil ways. And then you looted the hell out of his hideout.
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