| At an early age, you were apprenticed to the Great Wizard Garrett, but you grew tired of having to mop the floors and mop the alchemical equipment day in and day out. So, you stole a spellbook and took off to become a Wizard on your own. You rode into the city of Waltermatthau, and met a shadowy stranger in a hooded cloak who was sitting in the corner of the local bar. He told you about the legendary Amber Mosquito of Pinochle, which is rumored to be hidden in an ancient crypt near the village of Pittsburgh, and promised you a hefty fee if you could bring it to him. Figuring he wouldn't offer you the quest if it weren't level-appropriate, you readily agreed. It was pretty easy, until you had to actually go in the dungeon. That was when you fell in a antlion pit, got attacked by tramps, and got your lower back bitten off by a carrion crawler. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your teddy bear and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Grim Sorcerer Diablolo's army of skeletal gunslingers. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil butthole into his own lava pool, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Lurkmoor.
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