| You always knew that the village of Mondale wasn't big enough for you -- after all, it was just the one hut, and it was a small one. So, when you came of age, you decided to make a name for yourself as a Fighter. (You parents never gave you a name. You were hoping for "Opie".) Having heard many rumors about how Kilmer was being systematically sacked by a band of marauding hobos (who had already looted and burned the villages of Frog, Bobcat, and Spazmotic), and the ludicrous reward being offered for the lower back of their leader, you decided it was finally time to put your mettle to the test. You were doing a nifty job but you soon were confounded by a fiendish series of carefully timed jumps puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were unhappy as an underfed ferret. But, unwilling to let that keep you from glory, you gritted your teeth and wielded your bardiche, and cut your way through the hordes of indigent native tribesmen that stood between you and your goal. At last you found the lair of Skull Giant Diabolico, who quite unexpectedly turned out to be your long-lost daughter, but you killed the gimp anyway. And thus was the land freed from tyranny, and you earned yourself a fat reward!
|