| Ever since you were a little boy, you wanted to become a mighty pirate and sail the seven seas, looting and plundering. Unfortunately, the country of Glameroth is totally land-locked, so you had to settle for being a Thief. In the fiefdom of Phleberron, in the unpleasant-smelling backwater of Bobcat, you found an inn with cheap honey wine and spent the night carousing. There, you heard a tale of the forgotten treasure of the Emerald Caves, lost for ages during the time of the great rain of %pluralanimals. You decided to seek the treasure yourself, heedless of the literal mountain of skeletons of those who had tried before you. Everything was hunky-dory until you got lost in a tower -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet morningstar +1 in a owlbear's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some badgers into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the knee. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's crypt, dispatching desperados left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Blood Necromancer Englebert. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your battleaxe into his kidney. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil yokel was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Delawhat.
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