| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Swampleton, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a underdeveloped, skeletal "seamstress". You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Farnsworthington, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Malph, and heard the local blacksmith talking about the ancient necropolis that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Gold Idol of Evilthing that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. You had a good handle on it until you had to fend off half a dozen dark elves with your knee trapped in a succubus. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the flesh golem showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Terror Barbarian Evilthing held court over his horde of homely kobolds, and with uncountable swings of your halberd (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible dork and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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