| Lacking the patience to be a Mage and the brawn to be a Fighter, you decided to be the next best thing: a professional chef. Sadly, your recipe for charred flan was unappreciated by the plebes in your tiny hometown of Sudoku, so you became a professional Thief instead. As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Farnsworthington, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Whacking, and heard the local serf talking about the ancient sewer that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Gold Idol of Hasslehoff that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. There was no drama in the LBC but you soon were confounded by a fiendish guess-which-of-these-bottles-is-poison puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were disgruntled as an underfed sugar glider. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Skull Marquis Baaaal held court over his horde of cunning jocks, and with uncountable swings of your flail (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible wanker and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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