| You grew up the son of a tavernkeep, but decided such a profession was lacking in excitement. After much hard training, (if you never march in place again, it'll be too soon) you finally became a mighty Fighter. You headed off into the wild wilderness of Crunkleford in search of adventure, and upon your arrival at the great city of Limberford you heard a town crier shouting about how the the Poo-bah's fat homie had been kidnapped by tramps, and the massive reward for their rescue. Not wanting to get in the way of the plot railroad, you set out on your new quest. You weren't having any problems until you got your ear caught in a cookie jar and had to gnaw it off to escape. Fortunately, you don't need that to be a hero... but you will sort of miss it. However, you knew you'd never be a mighty adventurer if you let a little setback like that stop you, and damned if you were going to end up a bard in some crummy backwater like Bobcat or Phlegm. So you pressed onward until you discovered the lair of the Skull Devil Lord Bloodover, and after a long and dramatic battle you successfully put an end to his evil ways. And then you looted the hell out of his hideout.
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