Life here is the same as it ever was. Every morning, I have to rake the floor before I can eat breakfast. Usually, I have a big plate of croutons with a side of cucumbers, and wash it down with a glass of crème de menthe.

Yesterday I dared Timmy Gomez to throw a rock at Old Mr. Westinghouse's house. I didn't think he'd do it, but he totally did! The old man came running out in a dirty old bathrobe, waving his cane and yelling. I didn't really hear what he said because I was running too hard, but it sounded like "Arrrrgh blargle blargle blargle!" It was really scary, I thought he was gonna kill us! He isn't a very fast runner though.