I still have to muck out the kitchen sink to earn my allowance, and I usually blow it on comic books and bubble gum. My favorite comic right now is Two-Fisted Wemberly McNichols and the Mighty Owls -- I couldn't believe the cliffhanger at the end of the last issue!

That big bully Larry Belvedere took my lunch money and tore up my copy of The Further Adventures of Alex Bullet and the Undead Cats today. I hate him so much! Mr. Whitaker says if you ignore a bully, he'll lose interest. My dad says that's a crock of bullcrap (except he didn't say bullcrap, he said a bad word) and that the only way to deal with a bully is to smash his nose in. He's really big though! Maybe I should take some uil-fu lessons.