Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Raised-by-Trains Paco Steadwick

Hot: Red-Hot Thanatos "Sparky" Haskell, the Infernal Racketeer

Cold: Snowcone Fritz Westinghouse

Stench: Foul-Smelling Buck, Who Is Extremely Funky But Not In a Good Way

Spooky: Deathly Tomas "Corpsey" Young

Sleazy: Assless-Chaps Simon Nicholson, the Dapper Dan Man

Crimbo: Achilleswen "Boston Charlie" Figgypudding

The Hoboverlord sez: Brrrrr... Nicky... Smith's here. Weightlifter, weightlifter, table.

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