Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Honest Molly, the Trainyard Aristotle

Hot: John "JalapeƱo" Harris

Cold: Chilly Ignatz "Freezing Point" Des Moines

Stench: Wilbur Jackson, the Man Who Uses a Rotting Fish for Aftershave

Spooky: Bony Clive, the Hook-Handed Lurker

Sleazy: Assless-Chaps Moe Cooper

Crimbo: Gift-Wrappin' Maxeri "Jinglin' Bells" Sauerkraut, the Crimbo Tradition

The Hoboverlord sez: The Pope? Old Man... Easthouse's got... a SHIRT. Watch out!...

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