| Due to a misunderstanding, your sister enrolled you in Flanders Wizard School at a young age. (You were actually just interested in pulling coins out of ears.) Still, you graduated with high marks, and set out on your first adventure as a full-fledged Wizard. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Cheddarwurst. There, you met the Lord of Claremont's simple uncle, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Emerald Bear. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. At first it was a real breeze, until you had to fend off half a dozen tramps with your lower back trapped in a lava pool. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the rust monster showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. But, unwilling to let that keep you from glory, you gritted your teeth and wielded your handaxe, and cut your way through the hordes of thieves that stood between you and your goal. At last you found the lair of Death Sorcerer Blackfist, who quite unexpectedly turned out to be your long-lost cousin, but you killed the dork anyway. And thus was the land freed from tyranny, and you earned yourself a fat reward!
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