| Ever since you were a little boy, you wanted to become a mighty pirate and sail the seven seas, looting and plundering. Unfortunately, the country of Routh is totally land-locked, so you had to settle for being a Thief. As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Ov'reezy, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Cowpat, and heard the local barber talking about the ancient tomb that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Emerald Idol of Hatesternum that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. You weren't having any problems until you got attacked by more gnolls than you could handle. You were lucky to get out of there with your ear intact! But, unwilling to let that keep you from glory, you gritted your teeth and wielded your entrenching tool, and cut your way through the hordes of badgers that stood between you and your goal. At last you found the lair of Devil Witchlord Hasslehoff, who quite unexpectedly turned out to be your long-lost uncle, but you killed the douchebag anyway. And thus was the land freed from tyranny, and you earned yourself a fat reward!
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