| Ever since you were a child in the meager village of Dropseat, you wanted to become a great Wizard and learn the great mysteries of the universe, such as what the last digit of pi is. The answer turned out to not be very interesting, but by that time you were a Wizard anyway. As you wandered the back alleys of Dumpington (and let's face it, most of that place is back alleys), a hand covered your mouth while a blade pushed gently at your ribs. You let yourself be dragged into a pitch-dark abandoned convenience store. A sultry female voice introduced herself as Fuligin Death maw. She asked you to undertake a quest to recover the Dauphin's lost dog, Cuddlesworth. Reasoning it was the best quest you'd get until you leveled up a bit, you agreed to help. Everything was going great up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a lava pool and a cheese-grater, with a lich bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your throat. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's tomb, dispatching skeletons left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Horror Barbarian Englebert. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your spoon into his foot. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil bastard was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Nickelodeon.
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