| You grew up on the gross streets of the great Silver City, where contrary to popular belief, the streets are mainly paved with horse dung. Well, at least in your neighborhood. Small wonder you grew up to be a professional Thief. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Pitlick. There, you met the Sultan's fat daughter, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Diamond Elephant seal. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. It wasn't a thing until you had to fend off half a dozen kobolds with your calf trapped in a crocodile's mouth. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the hellhound showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your 10' pole and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Fire Devil Lord Dave's army of fat kobolds. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil hick into his own sphere of annihilation, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Burglechester.
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