| You grew up on the gross streets of the great Emerald City, where contrary to popular belief, the streets are mainly paved with horse dung. Well, at least in your neighborhood. Small wonder you grew up to be a professional Thief. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Piehole. There, you met the Duke of Coney Island's red-headed aunt, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Ruby Chicken. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. Everything was going great but you soon were confounded by a fiendish guess-which-of-these-bottles-is-poison puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were upset as an underfed boa constrictor. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Vampire Warlock Diabolicus held court over his horde of nubile desperados, and with uncountable swings of your flail (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible scrub and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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