| At an early age, you were apprenticed to the Great Wizard Daddy, but you grew tired of having to mop the floors and wax the alchemical equipment day in and day out. So, you stole a spellbook and took off to become a Wizard on your own. As you wandered the back alleys of Klatch (and let's face it, most of that place is back alleys), a hand covered your mouth while a blade pushed gently at your ribs. You let yourself be dragged into a pitch-dark abandoned brewery. A sultry female voice introduced herself as Grue Fear grip. She asked you to undertake a quest to recover a farmer's lost gerbil, Mrs. Cuddleface. Reasoning it was the best quest you'd get until you leveled up a bit, you agreed to help. You were rocking the house up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a beartrap and a gelatinous cube, with a mimic bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your thigh. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your teddy bear and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Skull Lawyer Diablolo's army of sexy indigent native tribesmen. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil douchenugget into his own vending machine, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Hamonrye.
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