| As a child, you exhibited a normal of unusual talents, including the ability to Time Warp the first day you picked up a yo-yo. So your parents, creeped out by your paranormal abilities, enrolled you in Wibbleshire Wizard School. Before long, you earned your Zeta of Amethyst and could set out to make your fortune. As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Flanders, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Hamlet, and heard the local farmhand talking about the ancient strip mall that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Azure Idol of Hasslehoff that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. There was no drama in the LBC up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a cheese-grater and a cheese-grater, with a roper bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your elbow. Fortunately, "giving up" isn't in your dictionary (probably because it's two words), so you persevered. You fought your way through countless skeletons and jerks -- even a horse! But eventually you found the lair of the sinister Frost Wizard Arc'klor, and were able to defeat him by knocking him into a lava pool with a lucky critical hit. Bruised but successful, you made it back to the nearby city of Reeves and claimed your reward.
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