As a baby you were stolen from your parents by a band of barbarians and raised in a dark and wild cave. They regarded you as one of their own, but the time came for you to make your own name as a professional Thief.

As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Zevroozlchester, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Rusty Nail, and heard the local milkmaid talking about the ancient sewer that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Topaz Idol of Breakhumerus that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest.

You had a good handle on it up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a sphere of annihilation and a antlion pit, with a owlbear bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your kidney.

Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's dungeon, dispatching badgers left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Vampire King Arc'klor. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your knife into his nipple. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil has-been was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Bale.

Loot:bastard sword of forthrightness
silver entrenching tool of forthrightness
fuchsia footaxe of clairvoyance

Another!