| An ancient prophecy foretold of a child born in the city of Wibbleford with a tuba-shaped birthmark, who would grow up to be the greatest Wizard ever known. You have a birthmark like that, but at first you were only a sort of okay Wizard. Everyone has to start somewhere, I guess. As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Waxton, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Piehole, and heard the local squire talking about the ancient crypt that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Emerald Idol of Krampus that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. You were rocking the house at first, but you didn't expect to have to bareknuckle-fight all those hobos. That beholder picked the total worst time to eat your battleaxe. But all that drama couldn't stop you. You'd never given up on anything, not even your childhood quest to sweep all the cat in your hometown of Cheddarwurst. So you kept going, right into the granary of the evil Giant Bonespirit. Fortunately for you, he was out for lunch at the time, so you could grab some loot and get out before you got your throat handed to you.
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