| As a baby you were stolen from your parents by a band of gunslingers and raised in a dark and wild forest. They regarded you as one of their own, but the time came for you to make your own name as a professional Thief. One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Ironforge when you met the town blacksmith. That worthy begged you to try and rescue the Grand Vizier's red-headed grandfather, who had been kidnapped by indigent native tribesmen. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. It wasn't a thing until you got lost in a strip mall -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet yo-yo +1 in a mimic's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some bandits into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the thigh. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Demon Sorcerer Morgar held court over his horde of thin goblins, and with uncountable swings of your handaxe (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible bimbo and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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