| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Flabbernathy, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a skeletal, raven-haired cook. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). At the tiny tavern on the outskirts of the Village of Mudhole, you were trapped in a conversation with a man who had clearly had more than his fill of jell-o shots. He told you about the great plague of kittens that had beset the entire region of Zevroozlchester, and of the rumor that the evil Marquis Goldthwait was the source of the unpleasantness. You resolved to find the villain and dispatch him, mostly to get the drunk guy to shut up. Everything was going great until you dropped your flail in a awkward conversation and couldn't get it back out. Wouldn't you know it, that was when the gnolls showed up. Fortunately, "giving up" isn't in your dictionary (probably because it's two words), so you persevered. You fought your way through countless indigent native tribesmen and orcs -- even a cockatrice! But eventually you found the lair of the sinister Dark Devil Lord Krampus, and were able to defeat him by knocking him into a succubus with a lucky critical hit. Bruised but successful, you made it back to the nearby city of Glameroth and claimed your reward.
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