Even though you were a nubile child, you always wanted to become a Fighter, like your father and his father before him. You got your wish when your hometown of Madlib was attacked by a horde of Fire Mice. You got your groin handed to you, but it cemented your desire to fight.

One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Cheddarwurst when you met the town blacksmith. That worthy begged you to try and rescue a knight's skeletal roommate, who had been kidnapped by bullywugs. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest.

Everything was hunky-dory until you had to actually go in the dungeon. That was when you fell in a beartrap, got attacked by dire dwarves, and got your arse bitten off by a mimic.

Fortunately, "giving up" isn't in your dictionary (probably because it's two words), so you persevered. You fought your way through countless badgers and bandits -- even a horse! But eventually you found the lair of the sinister Demon Lord Dave, and were able to defeat him by knocking him into a cookie jar with a lucky critical hit. Bruised but successful, you made it back to the nearby city of New Brunswick and claimed your reward.

Loot:contemptful salt cellar of thief control
scepter of stoic invisibility
tack hammer of invisibility

Another!