|Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Shamablamaroth, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a red-headed, thin barber. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest).|
Having heard many rumors about how Routh was being systematically sacked by a band of marauding gangsters (who had already looted and burned the villages of Dumpington, Cold Crick, and Flytrap), and the ludicrous reward being offered for the shoulder of their leader, you decided it was finally time to put your mettle to the test.
You were rocking the house until you got your lower back caught in a swinging razor-sharp pendulum and had to gnaw it off to escape. Fortunately, you don't need that to be a hero... but you will sort of miss it.
But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Death Necromancer Krampus held court over his horde of raven-haired dark elves, and with uncountable swings of your club (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible creep and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).