| At an early age, you were apprenticed to the Great Wizard Dave, but you grew tired of having to brush the floors and brush the alchemical equipment day in and day out. So, you stole a spellbook and took off to become a Wizard on your own. You headed off into the wild wilderness of Farnsworthington in search of adventure, and upon your arrival at the great city of Hamonrye you heard a town crier shouting about how the the Dauphin's cunning half-brother had been kidnapped by accountants, and the massive reward for their rescue. Not wanting to get in the way of the plot railroad, you set out on your new quest. At first it was a real breeze, until you had to fend off half a dozen desperados with your arse trapped in a sphere of annihilation. Fortunately, most of them ran away when the mimic showed up, and you played dead until it left. That's not very heroic, but hey, it worked. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's dungeon, dispatching goblins left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Blood Devil Lord Bleedsacrum. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your halberd into his solar plexus. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil douchewad was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Crunkleton.
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